Well, it almost rhymes.
We all look back over 2012 with a mixture of regrets and satisfaction. Same here. Everything we have been through has been intended by our loving God to be a learning experience. I usually wish that some of the things I have had to learn in a given year could have been gained by less painful methods, but the main thing is that I learn from life.
I began these 12 months researching and dreading the possibility of needing back surgery. My L5 vertebra had broken loose and slipped forward (spondylolisthesis), putting pressure on the nerve root to my lower right leg & foot. I opted for that surgery and on April 23 had 360 spinal fusion at the L4-L5-S1 level. The jury is still out on the wisdom of that decision and I'm not really sure when (or if) it will come out of the jury room! The back doc tells me I'm doing well, but the nerves in my lower legs (yes, that's with an "s") and feet don't agree with him. They, along with the rest of my rapidly deteriorating body, will have to wait and see if my nerves are indeed regenerating at the bullet-train rate of 1mm per day. By the tape measure I'm looking at about 1500 days, give or take a few. So far I'm a whopping 250 days in! Practially there! Calculated well date: June 1, 2016.
Just when I was beginning to turn a corner with the whole nerve issue in my left foot (the more painful one now), a blood clot set into my left leg. Through that process I learned that I have developed a blood condition called antiphospholipid syndrome. In short, I now tend to clot in a very unhealthy way. So, I will be on blood thinners and in compression hose the rest of my days. My left leg will always be at least a little bigger than my right one and not because of a highly developed muscle! On December 18, I had a procedure on the left leg to essentially insure that I will not have as many problems in that leg 10 years from now as I would have had otherwise.
Okay, so enough of the doom & gloom! God has gotten my attention very well in 2012. I had quite a few discussions with Him as I walked the streets around our home in my back brace. I learned to lean into Him in the long hours of the night when sleep was not where I normally found it. I wept my way through my first back-to-church service on Mother's Day, realizing not just how much I missed it, but how far my heart actually felt from God. I have prayed harder during this year than I have in a long time. I have been humbled by the ocean of prayers that have been uttered for me, most especially for how much my precious wife has asked God to heal and protect me. I don't know what I would have done without her presence and her encouragement.
As I close out 2012, in spite of the speed bumps in my health, I realize how fully blessed my life is. I can do almost anything that I need to do. I can carry on all my work duties at The Hills. I can do most of my household projects & chores. I sleep all night. I get to spend lots of time with my family. I can still do Wal Mart trips, if I pace myself. :)
All in all, I finish the year with great hope and energy. And, as if to add one more blessing to my list, God gave us a white Christmas! It was so great! All our grandkids were here at our house and once the snow had done it's thing, most of them hit the back yard for some frolicking in the beautiful whiteness! It was the perfect Christmas!
So, still some healing to do and plenty of blessings to enjoy! Happy 2013 to all! And...
Prayers up!
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